a romp in the hay
could be this rough.
When the tough get going
the going
gets tough.
So my girlfriend
slams me down
on my back.
Aggressive is her stance
and now,
a counter-attack!
Her tongue
licks my face
like an affectionate giraffe.
It tickles me silly
but I'm afraid
to laugh
as her backside
is blinding me
from any light.
I'm wondering
if I'll ever regain
my precious sight.
My instincts are correct.
I cannot
see.
My bladder
is empty.
I just had to pee.
We both lay there exhausted
and feeling
all wet.
I know I should've
never
made that last minute bet
by going up
against
a roller derby queen.
whose lovemaking habits
are really quite
obscene.
The kids come home
again
from boarding school.
Dear old dad
must look busy
with a garden tool.
I'm digging my grave
in the back
of the yard
while the roller derby queen
carries
my calling card.
For here lies a man.
May he rest
in peace
as her bullying tactics
will never
cease.
Oh my roller derby queen
you have loved me
so well
but this time around
I wasn't saved
by the bell!
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